Are you listening?

I got a call from my friend Allen this morning. He just called to ask if I was listening. Five couples got together at the Crawford's house for a prayer and share get together. It seems all of us feel in one way or another spiritually stagnant. At least we are not where we wish to be. It all started with a question that came up from the Wednesday night class that I skipped. Butch asked, "What is a radical Christian? I certainly don't think I'm one." well it turns out none of really felt like radical Christians and we spent some time trying to define it and wondering how we become one. I'm not sure if we really came up with anything but we did the best thing we could. We prayed for it. The moments when you come together as one in prayer are always powerful moments. All of us were sincere about wanting to be more. Several slogans come to mind, "be all you can be", " the few the Proud". They sound great but I'm not sure any of our slogans really apply to a Christian, a disciple of Christ. Pride certainly doesn't fit and I don't think being all you can be does either because truly becoming a radical Christian means you totally die and become one with Christ. Sounds to simple really. That's probably my problem, somehow I want to work for it and it can't be earned. I want that feeling of accomplishment and being a Christian isn't about accomplishment. When it comes down to it it is about giving up. Giving up everything to God. As an American I am extremely rich, I've always known this but it never really went deep until I went to Nicaragua this summer. Is that why it is so difficult for me to get to where I say I want to be? I'm to rich. I'm not sure but I think that is only one of my problems. I'm to rich. I want to feel like I have accomplished something. I have to much pride. I guess I could go on and on. Instead of continually trying I need to listen and give up.